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» » Barney Miller Homeless (1975–1982)

Short summary

The precinct is overrun with vagrants on Christmas. A merchant uses a cattle rod as his weapon of choice. A greeting card writer snaps.

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    • Author: Bort
    "Homeless" marks the sixth of seven appearances from Stanley Brock as store owner Bruno Bender, forever taking the law into his own hands (Brock's 8th out of 9 episodes overall). Here, he uses an electric cattle prod on the homeless Edward Pratkin (Don Calfa, last of seven), who has been sleeping in his store at night for the past few weeks, ever since his low rent apartment building was shut down. Bender is his usual gruff self, admonishing Pratkin for comparing it to being struck by lightning (Bender: "a couple'a hundred lousy volts, my pigeon shrugged that off!" Dietrich: "over here, bird brain!"). Mari Gorman (fifth of six) debuts as Naomi Bender, Bruno's wife of exactly one month, a memorable presence on each previous occasion, three as Officer Rosslyn Licori during the fourth season (both Benders appear in the series finale "Landmark"). The incident sparks a protest led by Sam Belinkoff (Walter Janowitz, fourth of five), another character who returns in "Landmark," nearly 100 homeless people gathered at the precinct for a long holiday evening together. Also snowed in is Howard Weckler (David Clennon, last of five) from the Human Resources Administration, who finds a suitable place for them to stay...in the Catskills! There's also Joseph Kellog (Paul Stolarsky), whose employment at the Loving Touch greeting card company was terminated during their annual Christmas Party, a pink slip wrapped inside a sympathy card (Harris: "Mr. Kellog was in the process of decking the halls with a barrage of deviled eggs, while at the same time submerging Kris Kringle's head in a punch bowl of highly spirited grog!"). Ben Piazza (last of three) plays Arthur Mench, Kellog's prissy boss, happily signing the complaint form against his former employee ("what is the problem Kellog, wasn't Santa good to you?").
  • Episode complete credited cast:
    Hal Linden Hal Linden - Capt. Barney Miller
    Max Gail Max Gail - Det. Stan 'Wojo' Wojciehowicz
    Ron Glass Ron Glass - Det. Ron Harris
    Steve Landesberg Steve Landesberg - Det. Sgt. Arthur Dietrich
    Ron Carey Ron Carey - Officer Carl Levitt
    Stanley Brock Stanley Brock - Bruno Bender
    Ben Piazza Ben Piazza - Arthur Minch
    Don Calfa Don Calfa - Edward Pratken
    David Clennon David Clennon - Howard Weckler
    Mari Gorman Mari Gorman - Naomi Bender
    Walter Janovitz Walter Janovitz - Sam Belinkoff (as Walter Janowitz)
    Zane Buzby Zane Buzby - Linda
    Paul Stolarsky Paul Stolarsky - Joseph Kellog
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