A strange thing happened the day after I saw Galaxina, back when it was released. The movie is a spoof of sci-fi movies and is full of jokes, puns and sight gags; but I just sat there in the theater and never laughed once. Or, more accurately, I didn't feel the least tickle of amusement. It was more like a string of detached observations of, "Ah, that joke flopped badly." If it had been a live performance, there would have been those crushing dead silences every time the actors paused to allow reactions to their jokes.

The next night, at a party, I was trying describe just how bad the movie really was. This involved, in part, telling several of the jokes. Surprisingly, my listeners laughed at them. I could flatter myself and claim that I'm such a hot comic that I could get laughs even reading the obituaries out loud. But that ain't so. Let's just say that I gave the jokes a mildly competent delivery... and that's what Galaxina didn't do.

Now, a work of genius is indefinable. No matter how much you analyze it, you can never quite pin down why it is so exceptional, while another film - with all the same objective attributes - is merely competent. The same is true of transcendent badness. The world is full of bad movies, with the same objective failures in budget, acting, writing and directing. But Galaxina is loaded with subtle catastrophes. There are nuances that extract the worst possible effect from so many scenes. And I can't quite figure out how it was done. Without this quality Galaxina might actually have ended up acceptably incompetent, a fun cheapo film, and gotten the laughs I did from its jokes.

I first saw this film when I was very young, so my judgement may be clouded by youthful rose-tinted glasses ... but what the hell, I like this flick. Call me inane, puerile, sophomoric, or just plain stupid, but I laughed (and STILL do!) whenever the soundtrack does that DOO-WAH whenever the Blue Star (I'm gracing it with caps) is mentioned. I beg anyone who likes this film to seek out the budget UK PAL region 0 DVD release of this film, as it features the full uncut (and indeed this film WAS shorn of some 10 minutes of non-essential footage in some prints, including the Rhino DVD), which to boot is presented in full 2.35:1 widescreen in a jaw-droppingly pristine transfer - for my money it was gleaned from the original negative. If not, YOU explain why it looks like it was shot yesterday. Compared to more recent DTV sci-fi parodies, Galaxina holds up well and deserves a re-appraisal... but see the uncut widescreen version first!

I got this movie when I saw it for $5 at this booth where this guy was selling a lot of old DVDs from Wal-Mart's defunct DVD rental service. I knew nothing about it, but saw the title, that it was the only film role for Playboy Playmate of the Year Dorothy Stratten, and that it was put out by Rhino, so I hauled off and bought it.

It begins with a rip-off of the Star Wars crawl, which they obviously thought needed to be three long paragraphs in order to be a true parody, because it goes on forever without having much to say. What it does is tell you that this ship is traveling along with Galaxina, who is this robot shaped like a Playboy Playmate who manages this ship. Then there is a LONG shot of the expanse of the ship, also like Star Wars, and the credits go on. The credits go on forever, in fact, pausing every now and then to show Galaxina in her glowly chair (a great image, but one we end up seeing a lot of) and the ship flying through space.

What strikes one right away is how straightfaced this all is. The tone is entirely serious and somber, even when the events of the story are ridiculous, which sets it apart from other space comedies like The Ice Pirates, which I just watched, and whose music offers a clue to the wacky tone throughout. Not here.

Anyway, so we're introduced to our crew, including Sarge, who is first seen doing rows and smoking a cigar. He looks a bit like Jackson Browne. There's another, prettier guy, and Captain Corneilius Butt, who is hilariously introduced at the climax of a 2001-like build-up. They hang out for a bit, with Butt torturing a captive alien for a while, before they encounter a Darth Vader-like alien who engages then in a space fight. There they are, deadlocked and waiting for one ship's shields to fail first, and then all of a sudden it's over with no explanation and they just proceed about their business.

Now, Galaxina, who wears a white outfit that can accurately be described as "form-fitting," cannot speak, and touching her (say when you're reaching round to goose her) delivers an electric shock. Then Captain Butt eats a disgusting space egg and burps up an Alien-type creature which escapes into the ship. Then Sarge declares his love for Galaxina, and endures a painful shock just to embrace her for a moment.

They are then ordered to go fetch the Blue Star, every mention of which cues a burst on the soundtrack like upon the utterance of "Frau Bluerheher" in Young Frankenstein. They will have to go into cryosleep for 27 years to get there, and 27 more to get back, which they are justifiably annoyed about. But all is forgiven when they are offered ONE night of rec leave. What does this say about the priorities of the working classes? So they spend one night in a space brothel where they are entertained by a variety of strange female aliens. This sequence is obviously modeled on the cantina sequence from Star Wars, and features makeup that is comparable to that movie. Then into cryosleep. While in cryosleep the little alien comes out and tries to dethaw Captain Butt, but cannot figure out the code and eventually gives up with a whimper.

While the guys are in cryosleep Galaxina, who has fallen in love with Sarge, teaches herself to speak and makes her body warm and soft. Upon thawing him out she offers herself to him, saying that she'll make his every wish her command. Then she is kidnapped by space bikers who are going to sacrifice her to the god "Har Lee David Son," when she is rescued, they get the blue star, the end.

Somewhere in here is a funny commercial that says "Do you have a drinking problem? Then come on down to Happy Hour Spirits! We've got all the booze you need!" So, what of it? It's obviously a highly silly thing (that wears out its welcome after an hour—why do all movies HAVE to be at least 90 minutes?), but what's strange is that the tone throughout is sort of spacey and somber, which makes all the supposedly funny scenes and wackiness have a strange kind of hypnotic sadness and loneliness. That's the most notable thing about this movie (well, I guess aside from Stratten), but it's not really enough to make watching it worthwhile.

And what of Stratten? She is pretty and has a great body, showcased throughout, but it seems odd for a movie which seems to exist mostly to highlight her and her charms, that she remains fully covered throughout and doesn't really even do much that's outwardly sexy. Huh. Stratten is the subject of Bob Fosse's Star 80, which is now comfortably ensconced in my rental list.

There is an easter egg where you can click on the spaceship in the middle of the menu, leading you to "alien audition footage," which is really three pieces of primitive computer animation. The most convincing explanation is that some guy who worked on the DVD had these student projects in computer animation, and couldn't bear to see them just thrown out.

That's about it. Not really worth seeking out (unless you want to oogle Stratten), but not really painful to sit through. Another one of those strange oddities (and odd it definitely is) that was made… for some reason that remains unclear.

-- Hey, check out Cinema de Merde, my website devoted to bad and cheesy movies. You can get the url from my email address above...

I bought this for £1 on DVD and it got left on my shelf for AGES till I decided to unwrap it and watch it in an effort to get through all the unwatched films in my collection.

The movie didn't start out that promising it and not that funny. You could see the jokes were there but most just didn't work (although I did find anything that came out of Sam Wo's mouth quite funny), as the film gets on the jokes do get better and it's just something you have to get into.

This film is probably best left to those who can stand(or do I mean enjoy) the work of Empire pictures as this will give you an idea of the kind of stuff to expect.

It's not a laugh riot, it's not a classic, but there are some very funny lines in there and interesting visuals. But ultimately I guess it could have been a lot better. I think it may grow on me after a few watches and maybe I could convince some of my friends to watch it too. 4/10

Dorothy Stratten is the only reason to watch this unfunny sci-fi spoof, and her appearance is a disappointment. Though she has the title role, her screentime is limited, and she only speaks a few lines of dialogue. If you're not a Stratten fan, pass this one up.

... what a porn movie would look like if you took out the sex and just left in the bad dialog, cheap sets and bad acting, you would have Galaxina.

This film came out when the Original Star Wars proved there was a market for Science Fiction. This in turn lead to some gems such as Alien and a revitalized Star Trek. Unfortunately, it also led to some bad movies, and this was obviously one of them. (I say obviously, because I hadn't even heard of this film until a few days ago.I missed it when it came out in 1980.)

Here's the underlying problem. Dorothy Stratton couldn't act, so for most of the movie, they didn't even let her try. I understand her tragic death has given this film an undeserved cult status, but for the life of me I can't understand why.

Clearly, the movie tried to Spoof Star Wars, Star Trek and Aliens, but they clearly don't understand than when you spoof something, it has to be FUNNY! This movie wasn't, or at least, the comic timing on jokes that could have been funny weren't. Science Fiction is ripe for parody, as Spaceballs and Galaxy Quest proved. This movie, however, did it poorly.

If you take this movie as camp, and don't expect any deep "filme discovere" nuances, you will have a helluva good time! There are many quotable lines, so if you watch it with a bunch of friends, you may find yourselves saying to one another, "If a jackass had both your brains, he'd be a very dumb jackass!" Avery Schreiber is one of those poor souls who were delegated to the "sidekick" and "character actor" roles. You may remember him from commercials, rather than from film, but he is a force to be reckoned with, comically. I can almost unequivocally guarantee that you will LOVE him in this film! This film is one of those rare gems that transcends its own "badness." It is so supremely awful, that it becomes great.....Much like Woody Allen.

Enjoy!

Come on guys, Galaxina is not that bad. I got it as a present from a friend who knows about my interest in let's say 'not so commercially successful flicks'. A DVD for one pound sterling seemed to qualify for that category. So we watched it together and I have to say I was the only one who admitted loving Galaxina. Okay, it's not the funniest movie ever made; however I made me (and the others) laugh. Not always when it was probably intended...

To put it in a nutshell, I have seen much worse movies, and after all Galaxina isn't taking itself seriously either. It's worth reading about Dorothy Stratten, (Galaxina) and her fate here on IMDb or the web.

So, give it a chance!

Martin

Daffy sci-fi spoof, from director William Sachs(The Incredible Melting Man), has a space crew commissioned to find a blue crystal, dueling with a villainous mechanical creature also desiring it. The film's titular character is played by Dorothy Stratton, hired it seems based on her sexiness(..she does look mighty fine in her tight space suit)alone for she remains rather "robotic"(..written as a robot allows her to look great without worry of delivering a meaningful performance)throughout. Stephen Macht is a crew member in love with Galaxina, but is not allowed to touch her due to programming wiring her to shock anyone who makes contact. Soon, however, somehow Galaxina finds a way to feel an emotional attachment to him, and while the crew are in suspended animation for decades due to their ship's inability to hyper-jump through space as other more superior travel vessels, readjusting her programing so she can develop more intimacy with the man she loves.

Sachs' film homages Kubrick's 2001 by featuring almost exclusively classical composers' works as the score to Galaxina. You get spirited homages to Star Wars as Sachs' film features an alien western bar where humans are on the menu, and an intergalactic brothel(..oh, Sachs, you sly devil, you!)where weary travelers can unwind. The budget for the ship interiors, costumes, and special effects involving the space vessels are quite small. There are lots of ugly rubber-suited creatures(..including a rock-eating monster with piranha teeth kept prisoner in the ship for swallowing the Queen's jewels)and ghastly make-up effects on the faces of many humans portraying alien humanoids. While not always hitting the mark, Sachs provides enough for fans of popular sci-fi films of the time(..including an inspired homage to Alien)to keep his audience entertained.

Avery Schreiber is the captain of the ship, with James D Hinton as Macht's sidekick, wearing a cowboy hat and a soiled Dodgers jersey. The planet of Altar, where the blue crystal is located, is a place where the worst of the galaxies retreat, including a gang of leather hoods who worship a Harley Davidson motorcycle as it's god, and plenty of ghoulish alien monsters. Other crew members under Captain Cornelius Butt(Schreidber)include Lionel Mark Smith as Maurice, with pointy ears and bat-like wings, and Tad Horino, as a pipe-smoking china-man always offering words of wisdom rejected by his peers..they are the ones with the responsibility of the ship's engineering, keeping the rust bucket up and running. I think this is the kind of flick to watch on those dead afternoons when nothing's happening and you want to waste 80 minutes. Stratton is mighty nice to gaze upon for 80 minutes, as well.

Many people are devastated after seeing this movie, saying: how can something be so terribly un-funny? The reason for this total disaster is simple: if you want to do a science fiction parody, you have to understand the rules by which the genre works. John Carpenter did a brilliant comedy with a budget even lower than Galaxina, "Dark Star". He was familiar with the rules of the genre, that's why it worked. "Galaxy Quest" had a few hilariously funny scenes, because the movie was referring to all the cliches of SF. The people who are responsible for Galaxina obviously had no real love for the genre, it was just a futuristic setting but no substance and no concept, thus the movie became entirely empty. Empty of anything: acting, story, fun, thrill... Avoid this void.

This is not the worst movie I've ever seen. I did not feel like I wanted to remove my eyeballs forcibly after watching Galaxina. It just is not good. The jokes are almost funny, but fall short. All of them. The few gags that come close are beat back down by repeating them over and over. The production values are, well, non-existent. The sound is bad, the lighting is bad, ... it just seems cheaply made; overly so. The dialog ... well, often it is missing - many awkward silences; they are all just standing around, and it seems like someone should be saying something. The film even seems ambivalent about what it wants to be - it is not always clear that it was intended as a comedy - like maybe that developed after shooting started. It feels like someone's film project that they threw together the night before it was due, and if they had put two weeks into it, it could have been good.

And I'm easy to please. I thought "Mom and Dad Save the World" was a hoot. I like "Pluto Nash". "Mystery Men" is one of my favorite movies. "Spaced Invaders" is well nigh unto a classic. This turkey just doesn't do it. "Space Truckers" was more believable.

Avery Schreiber, who can be very funny, tries too hard. His part calls for a straightman, and he plays it leaning toward sitcom. Dorothy Stratten is OK in her role, but not particularly noteworthy.

Oh, yeah, the "My watch is always slow." line was funny. I'll give this movie all the kudos it can get, it needs it.

The space vehicle models are not bad, but they are few and are not used effectively. The space scenes are vague. No sweeping passes, no close up detailed fly-bys, not even appropriate action scenes when they dock. (The Infinity does crash land very oddly at one point.) The flight dynamics are terrible; worse than anything you've seen, they're jerky, not smooth. The initial battle is stilted and static; even though the two ships have just shown that they can maneuver in their jerky fashion, they trade (slow) shots at close range in a manner that is more reminiscent of a 16th century sea battle, except not as exciting.

The aliens - imagine if all of Star Wars was the cantina scene. That many rubber masks could get dull rather rapidly, no? A few are used as sight gags that work OK the first time, but not the fifth.

Mercifully, if you attempt to watch Galaxina, you are likely to fall asleep. (I got busy doing something else and missed the last ten minutes, and did not feel like it was worth replaying it. If that doesn't say "It sucked", I don't know what does.) Sadly, there is a lot of potential, and this could easily have been a good movie. It would be easy to remake this and have a decent film.

MadKaugh

I have yet to watch STARCRASH (1979) - that notoriously cheesy Italian take on STAR WARS (1977) - but it can't be much worse than this misbegotten piece of junk which, suffice it to say, makes Mel Brooks' so-so SPACEBALLS (1987) look like a veritable work of art! In fact, the main reason why GALAXINA is remembered at all nowadays is because of the tragic fate which befell its leading lady - Playboy centerfold Dorothy Stratten who was killed by her insanely jealous estranged husband - before the film had even had its official premiere!

Although Statten (who subsequently had two biopics made about her wherein she was portrayed by Jamie Lee Curtis and Mariel Hemingway) plays the title role, for the first half of the film she is reduced to being propped up in a chair ostensibly driving a spaceship on a 27-year journey to some planet or other; in fact, Galaxina is an all-purpose android who also serves the wacky crew their snacks, gets them all hot under the collar and even goes scouting for the Blue Star (cue choral music) once they land! Having said that, Statten certainly looks luminous in her white attire and, even if her role hardly demands much exertion of any acting talent she might possess, it's not exactly demeaning either.

Still, it's ironic that for a film which bears her name, she is overshadowed by the campy and would-be zany antics of her fellow crew members, especially the annoying Captain Cornelius Butt (which gives you the idea of the level of comedy on display here), a long-eared, wing-sporting colored guy, a pot-smoking, proverb-quoting old Chinaman and, best of all (relatively speaking) a foul-mouthed, rock-eating, hairy alien creature they hold prisoner. The villain of the piece is a metal-clad non-entity who does, however, have the best laugh in the film when, upon hearing the choral music following his every mention of the Blue Star, exclaims, "What is this s**t?" There is little point in listing the sci-fi classics which are mauled by this stinker in its ludicrous attempts at spoofing the genre since they are not only lame but obvious; incredibly enough, a chest-busting but ultimately benign alien is apparently played by diminutive Hollywood veteran, Angelo Rossitto!

For what it's worth, then, the scenes shot on the planet they visit (which looks more like a Western set than a planetary landscape) have a yellowish, sun-like hue and its inhabitants are 'human gourmets' (delicacies on their menu include Skin and Tonic, Scotsman on the Rocks, Thigh Pies, Baked Alaskan, etc), not to mention a motorcycle gang who serve their own particular deity (the Harley Davidson) and when our heroes escape on the back of it, they dare not shoot at them for fear of hitting their "Lord". God(awful) indeed...

This picture hit the movie screens on June 6th 1980, starring Stephen Macht as Sergeant Thor, Avery Schreiber as Captain Comelius Butt, J.D. Hinton as Buzz and starring Playmate of the year Dorothy Stratton. The picture starts with the police infinity roaming space looking for I guess criminals. There ship is suddenly attacked by an unknown space ship. Enters Sergeant Thor and his partner Buzz as they try to figure out who the unknown ship belongs to. When failing they call on Captain Comelius who instructs his crew to fight back. Enters the gorgeous Dorothy Stratton, who plays the role of Galaxina who is man made robot. An now a few thoughts on this picture. This movie was plan stupid and it's one of the reasons that I don't get into Sci-Fi. If you're into Sci-Fi you would have notice that the laser sound effects were borrowed from an early Sci-fi movie titled Battlestar Galactica which aired in theaters in 1978. Many of the door sounds that you hear in this movie came from another Sci-Fi movie that aired back in 1966 titled Star Trek. Now for the reason that I bought this movie, Dorothy Stratton. She is gorgeous in her one piece suit. I think her talents were wasted in this picture and she should have never been involved in such garbage. Connie Sellecca was also considered for the role and her talents would have been wasted also. On the picture alone I give this movie 1 weasel star and on Dorothy Stratton I give her 10 weasel stars even though she didn't deserve to be put into a trash movie like this. If you like pictures like this you can get the DVD version on Amazon.com

Galaxina is an unsung little gem of a film, not a masterpiece by any measure, but an entertaining little film. It's basically a comedy/spoof of a few other sci-fi classics like ALIEN and STAR WARS. Captain Butts is a standout as the funniest character in the film, especially when they visit the alien brothel before going off on a long voyage.

Dorothy Stratten as Galaxina is beautiful, it's a pity she died so young. The rest of the cast are also good, or as good as the dodgy dialogue will let them be.

I would compare this to SPACEBALLS, but I think this is far better, it doesn't have the budget or the cast of SPACEBALLS but still does a damn good job at being dumb entertainment. If you can get past the cheapness of it you should definitely get a few good laughs from it.

The more I watch it, the more I love it. Highly recommended.

Sometimes movies are SO bad you just laugh anyway. (There are exceptions, such as Barfly. Worst movie ever made). I know loads of people who saw this movie at my house and almost everyone giggled at the silliness or moaned in pain at a really bad one liner. The movie is not the greatest in the world, but good enough for bad science fiction fans. The idea of the movie might be used today and rewritten. With the effects that can be done today, it could be funny if someone did it right. I recommend you watch it at least once. Be prepared for dry, goofy humor and sight gags that almost work... but have a sense of humor when you watch it or you will fall asleep. Watch for the bad edits. I had a lot of fun watching this one with my friends and a bottle of tequila.

Galaxina is a hidden jewel, a very funny spoof of SF movies and TV shows from Star Trek to Star Wars. Not a perfect movie, and with cheap special effects, it is nonetheless one of my favorite funny SF movies, along with Spaceballs and Dark Star. Give it a chance!

In the 31st century the wacky crew of the police cruiser the Infinity -- zany Captain Cornelius Butt (a delightfully daffy Avery Schreiber), macho, cigar-chewing Sergeant Thor (solid Stepen Macht), gung-ho cowboy pilot Buzz (affable James David Hinton), sexy servant robot Galaxina (a charming performance by gorgeously voluptuous 1980 "Playboy" Playmate of the Year Dorothy Stratten), funky black winged alien Maurice (lively Lionel Mark Smith) and laid-back wizened Oriental Sam Wo (mellow Tad Horino) -- are assigned to retrieve the powerful mystical gem the Blue Star before the dastardly Darth Vader-like villain Ordric (sonorously voiced with rip-snorting aplomb by Percy Rodrigeuz) gets his evil hands on it. Writer/director William Sachs pokes enjoyably broad fun at a slew of popular science fiction movies and TV shows which include "ALIEN," "Star Trek," and "Star Wars," tossing in equally goony parodies of 60's biker flicks and spaghetti Westerns for good measure. Among the comic highlights are a grouchy foul-mouthed rock-eating monster, a visit to a wild interstellar brothel (Marilyn Joi pops up in a bit part as a winged girl prostitute), a nasty alien bar with various human delicacies on the menu, a biker gang that worships the motorcycle Harley Davidson as if it was a god, an Old West-style showdown between Ordric and Galaxina, an angelic choir singing on the soundtrack whenever the Blue Star gets mentioned, and Angelo Rossitto as a cute reptilian dwarf creature. Dean Cundey's handsome, polished cinematography, the surprisingly excellent special effects, the engagingly breezy throwaway tone, and the lush orchestral classical music score are all on the money fine and impressive as well. An amiably silly hoot.

I'm not a movie snob. I've liked lots of movies that critics hate, and I've hated movies that critics love. However, I have to agree with critics here--"Galaxina" is just substandard. Clearly intended to be a comedy, it only has a few scattered laughs. "Galaxina" has poor photography; it has poor special effects; it has some pretty poor acting; and the production values...well, the sets might as well have been made of cardboard.

"Galaxina" tells the story of a spaceship whose crew is looking for a magical object called "The Blue Star". After a long voyage (and some very unconvincing space battles), the crew arrives at its destination, a sort of wild west alien world. There's a painfully unfunny cantina scene (clearly designed to be a spoof of the famous "Star Wars" scene), a chase involving space bikers, and a final getaway.

The cast tries, but can't breathe life into this turkey. Stephen Macht and Avery Schreiber have done better work in other movies. James David Hinton is pretty good as a member of the spaceship's crew. The late Dorothy Stratten stars as the robot of title, and while she looks great, her role doesn't give her much of a chance to act.

You might catch this film to see Dorothy Stratten. However, if you're looking for a good movie, you'll probably want to skip this one.

For connoisseurs of bad movies, Galaxina is a true gem. With truly horrid dialog, acting, and directing, it's no choice for people seeking a proper movie. But as one of the most unintentionally hilarious movies of its genre, it's priceless for a good laugh. In particular, the scenes involving the Harley Davidson-worshiping motorcycle cult are especially good, and many other scenes present an opportunity for a cheap laugh.

Sadly, the scenes with Dorothy Stratten really fail to deliver, but since she's playing an android, I suppose one can excuse her for wooden acting.

Bad movie-lovers, don't pass this one up!

I don't remember when I first saw this movie --I'm sure it was late night HBO as a kid when I was not supposed to be watching. But it is one that just kind of grows on you. I own the DVD but just watched it On Demand through Comcast today and still saw something new.

Is it a "B" Movie? Absolutely. And they make no real pretense it's not low budget. However, I think some of their covers were pretty clever. An industrial hallway becomes the main corridor of the ship. 70's furniture is futuristic (this was 1980.) And of course the planet they visit will have an Old West/Biker Movie theme. The Tavern in the town is "Aliens Only" and they only serve humans on the menu. What a menu, part of the fun is in the reading - it is both gross and clever at the same time.

Watching this. I like to think Dorothy Stratten could have really done on to do more. While she is not the greatest and it's rather obvious she is a beginner, she showed potential. Avery Schreiber mostly steals the show -- especially the end credits.

Dialog is either very clever or very stupid. The spoof commercials are worth a chuckle. To paraphrase one: "Do you have a substance abuse problem? Great! We have locations all over the galaxy to serve you." The majority of the soundtrack is classical music -- which works (and was no doubt cheap). If you have watched any other films of the early 80's that disco crap quickly becomes annoying.

We had a lot of fun trying to place all the other shows and films, they shamelessly "borrowed" from. Star Trek, Battlestar Galactica, 70's horror films, even the Batmobile makes an appearance.

If nothing else, a drinking game for every time they say the BLUE STAR (A-HA!) is definitely in order.

If you want to see serious scifi, this is not your film. If you want to take a bit of a mental break, enjoy the classical music, try to figure out where they stole material from, and see the very lovely Dorothy Stratten before she was murdered. This is a good movie.

Recap: The police cruiser Infinity is given the gruesome task to go to the planet Altair to retrieve the Blue Star (tadaa). The crew, already bored from a long patrol mission, do not really look forward to the 54 year roundtrip. Well, to ease their mind they're given a day off at the local brothel before leaving. And during the travel to Altair, Galaxina, the hot but inaccessible robot that flies the ship during cryosleep, alters herself so she could fall in love with the sergeant… But Ordric from Mordric ha his own plans for the Blue Star (tadaa).

Comments: A low budget (or so it seems now anyway), part spoof part comedy sci-fi. The effects are just barely better than atrocious, the acting really horrible. This is that kind of a movie that is fun to watch because it is so bad, so ridiculous (such as tire screeches in space, yes really). So, despite its poor quality, it is actually quite entertaining. They just don't make those kind of movies anymore.

On a sadder note, watch Dorothy Stratten, a beautiful twenty year old girl, play Galaxina. She was murdered before the original premiere… Her legacy resulted in more movies, and today it might be as much reason to watch Galaxina. If you're not into silly movies like this one…

5/10

How can ANYBODY give this anything higher than a '1'?

I thought "Manos, the Hands of Fate" would forever be the worst movie ever to impinge itself upon my optic nerve. Indeed, I didn't think anything COULD be worse.

I was wrong. "Galaxina" is that rare movie where EVERY SINGLE ELEMENT of it is achingly, agonizingly, blindingly bad. How often have you watched a movie and commented, "Who the hell LIT this thing?" From lighting to soundtrack to effects to script to acting to cinematography to . . . well, EVERYTHING, this movie is absolutely unendurable. It's so bad, I couldn't even tell for some time if it was the worst comedy or the worst drama I'd ever seen.

It's too bad even to be laughable. I'd sooner eat a platefull of broken glass than sit through it again.

Well, I finally got around to watching this flick, having bought it some months ago for 50p on DVD after reading some good things about it on a forum (possibly from Sic Coyote, I know his review is around here somewhere).

I think I laughed about 3 times throughout the film's 90 minutes running time. The opening line of the captain's log is a true corker, but this remains the highlight of the movie.

The film remains notable for the presence of Dorothy Stratten in the title role, and even though she has relatively little to do, she does a fine job. Also present are veteran John Carpenter cinematographer Dean Cundey (who's work is seen in it's full 2.35:1 ratio on this DVD, surprising for a half a quid disc) and FX master Chris Walas, who you'd have a hard time believing went on to do the wonderful effects on Gremlins and The Fly after seeing this.

All in all, not the worst film I've ever seen, but far from the best.

The odd thing about Galaxina is not that it is supremely bad, although it is. The odd thing is that in spite of being supremely bad, it is not funny. Supremely bad movies have their own particular brand of unintended humor--the secret of their success, you might say. But Galaxina is quite uniquely different--it is MST3K's worst nightmare, a bad movie in which the intentional *and* the unintentional humor alike fall flat.

It is easy enough to figure out why the intentional jokes fail--and the reasons are quite varied. Sometimes it's a timing question; sometimes it's a good idea badly worked out (the human restaurant *could* have been hilarious, but it wasn't); sometimes it feels like there was some mixup in the cutting room, with the punchline ending up on the floor; and sometimes the jokes are just bad jokes. Bad movies get their laughs from such unintentional snafus. It's harder to figure out why Galaxina doesn't get any laughs on that count. Something is subtly wrong with the unintentional humor in this movie, just as something is wrong (not at all subtly) with the intentional humor. It is a supremely bad movie whose very badness is not the redeeming quality it usually is. It's absolutely unique in my experience.

This is a scifi spoof like no other.

I have seen this movie several times and every time it gets funnier.

Avery Schreiber is hilarious as Capt. Cornelius Butt, in charge of a Police Space Cruiser. This is Schreiber at his best, very funny guy. The police ship is sent on a mission that will require years of hibernation, so they get shore leave before they go. I can still hear them singing, as they march in unison down the corridor of their ship: "Porno, porno, porno lets go! Hail forth and ho hail ho ho ho ho, ho ho ho ho Porno porno porno lets go!...." During their flight, the captain's hibernation gets turned off by a creature that was hatched ala "Alien" when he ate an unusual egg earlier. The little creature thinks he's it's mother. When the ship arrives, the captain has so much hair he can't see where he's going, and he's aged so much he can barely walk.

The mission is to find "The Blue Star". After anyone says its name (The Blue Star), there's a chorus of angels. When they get to the planet, they find that the Blue Star (ah aaaah!) has been taken by a gang of bikers who worship their lord and master Harley David Son (vroom, vroom)an old chopper they all pray to. We also find out that Galaxina has changed herself so she can be physical with the crew member who fell for her. As their making out, he's suddenly sad. She asks why, and he says "well, we can't, you know..." to which she replies "They have it in the catalogue".

There are many classic moments in this movie, like the Human Restaurant that serves ...what else? Humans. They have "Lady Fingers" on the menu, and they're really lady's fingers.

The people who gave this a really bad score just don't get it. Which is OK. It's a comedy/spoof. Take it for what it is and enjoy.

If you you're not a big scifi fan, and don't like camp, then skip it.